Overcome Transition By Deciding Powerfully

 

For this 7th edition of the Joyful Sovereignty Weekly, my intention is give a framework and encouraging message to help you navigate any transition in your life.
Read The Previous Edition Here

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When I think of transition, two animals come to mind.
The toad and the butterfly.

Each has a challenging journey from one phase of their existence to the next.

The tadpole begins life in the water, transitioning to having legs and roaming around on the land.

The caterpiller goes through a complete metamorphosis to become a butterfly.

I sometimes wonder what a similar transformation might look like for a human.

How frightening and challenging would that be?

Yet, every tadpole and caterpillar go through this transformation (the ones that make it).

It’s amazing actually.

Nature has a way of helping us understand something so beautifully.

When we find ourselves in the middle of a transition, we can get lost in the process.

There is a way through, but it’s sometimes the answer isn't so clear. Let’s dive into the journey of transition and how you can use this framework to alleviate pain.

Transition is like being in a game of tug of war and you are the rope. You're pulled in different directions. Not sure which side will “win”.

Will it be the old story or the new story?

It is a conflicting time and each moment can feel like an eternity.

When it leans one direction, you feel it fully. When it leans in the other, you feel that fully too. You don’t know what to expect.

There may be so much potential with the new story, that you have a million ways you could proceed. Nothing is clear.

In all this, you know one thing for certain. You have no idea what's gonna happen lol.

There is a familiarity in the known suffering.

Although it may not feel the best, it is something you know. You recognize it. You’ve been there before. Often times when you first got into this chapter, you were thrust in it.

But now that you’ve been in it for a while, it can be tough to leave.

Maybe you learned these ways when you were more naïve.

Perhaps you had more energy “back in the day” to completely face something unknown head on. But now you’re here, leaving something.

Lots of emotions and thoughts can occur. You may be all over the place. You don’t know what to think. You’re conflicted.

You may be in a position to let some people down. These people could be family, friends or colleagues. They all know you as “this person”. Meaning, you are a certain way, because that’s who you’ve been.

But there’s a changin’ happening right now within you.

You have an opportunity to for an identity reset.

An opportunity to ask “who am I?”

This is an opportunity to become the next version of yourself. This reset will take courage.

Your previous identity has been wrapped up in your previous life and chapter.

It’s an opportunity to let go of pride, ego and what you “think” you know about yourself. A fresh start in a sense.

What if you had a clean slate with life?

What if you could reinvent yourself?

The clarity of those answers come to you. In the meantime, you can move the process in another way.

You can look back at what you’re letting go of. Packaging up what you are leaving behind.

Taking a good look at and what it offered you. A cherished moment of appreciation for how it brought you to this moment in your life.

And while you’re at it, you can let go of negative talk, limiting beliefs and other things that are holding you back. Might as well.

This letting go actually makes room for the new chapter. This void you’re creating allows for ideas, insights and action steps of this new chapter to emerge.

When you’re in the thick of it, it feels like chaos.

You have a conversation with someone, and then things feel so clear and easy. Then the next day you talk with someone else, and that topic feels so clear and certain. Problem is, they’re the exact opposite of each other.

It’s almost as if you have to live day by day to keep your sanity. You just have to weather the storm of this transition.

The chaos of metamorphosis is a good analogy.

The true north star will reveal itself eventually. But it doesn’t feel like it will be today.

During times of chaos, directing your focus and attention on today is a useful strategy. 

Letting go of what you think tomorrow will bring, and allow the Present Moment to guide you.

The more present you are with what’s going on today, the more will be revealed.

I recently went hiking up a trail I hadn’t in a good while.

This particular trail is a good workout. At first, I was going to listen to some music, but I opted to just be with my body and nature.

I was present with myself and focused on the step I was taking. I wasn’t focusing on plans for the rest of the day. Or the book I’m writing. Or business plans.

I was just Present in the Moment.

Before I knew it, insights and clarity started to show up. Analogies popped into my head without trying.

As I was taking each step, that was a metaphor for what I was going through in my life.

Observing hikers on the trail brought more insights about myself.

The moment I took a little break to “smell the roses”, reminded me of something important.

And so on.

The secret? I was Present with what was around me.

The byproduct? Answers and insight came to me.

This can be a slippery slope. Because you could say you’re gonna go into nature and be Present, but have an ulterior motive. An intention to receive insights. That can happen yes, but in my experience it works best when you completely let go of agenda.

I bring this up for a reason. If you are present with what each day brings, that helps you navigate the chaos you may be experiencing.

And also, nature is a great way to neutralize chaos lol.

Love me some nature.

Part of the conflict is that a part of you is actually excited about the future.

You see and feel the possibility of what could be. There is a future that is exciting and tugs on your curiosity.

But you're not sure if you can trust it.

It is (sort of) unknown to you. All you know is that you’re excited about the potential of it.

You talk with people that spark ideas of what you could do in this next chapter of life. They may be deep on their path and tell you of their life and you resonate deeply with some of it.

You get caught in the excitement of it all.

Opportunity is knocking again, and this time it looks like a shift in how you operate life.

You can actually allow this excitement and curiosity to become a North Star for your path.

Yes, balance other factors in your life. But allow curiosity to play a bigger role in your guidance.

This “new” North Star is for yourself. This is guided BY you and not some organization that has an agenda or purpose for you. Instead, begin to unravel your own authentic purpose that you are creating as you go. This process will take time, but welcome it.

This North Star clarity will help you gain alignment inside and out. This transition is a gift to allow yourself to match who you are becoming on the inside, with who you are expressing on the outside.

They become one and the same.

That alignment will give you the peace.

That alignment will give you the fulfillment you seek.

That alignment will give you the deep joy you crave.

This process unfolds day by day.

It doesn’t happen overnight, until it does.

You likely won’t notice it until someone points something out. You may get hit with some clarity like a brick to the face (but in a good way lol).

Before we talk about the turning point, let’s dive into a scenario. If you DON'T choose a North Star based on your curiosities and excitement.

You find yourself in a predicament…

You may realize you’re gonna have to choose between the old story and the new chapter.

The old story is the safe choice. It is the known. Even though you feel that chapter has ran its course, you still hesitate to do something that you don’t know.

Yet at the same time, you feel such excitement for this emerging chapter. You actually feel this new chapter is the path to deeper states of joy, peace and satisfaction with life.

With this awareness, you know there is a fork in the road coming soon. You don’t have to decide today, but it’s coming.

That lack of deciding also has a feeling of friction within. That is on top of all the uncertainty, resistance and uncomfortableness you’re already feeling.

To make matters a little worse, the people in your life are telling you to stay in the same kind of story. They like you for who you used to be. They don’t want you to change.

The people around you can be the most helpful, or the most discouraging during this transition.

You have to decern who you will listen to and who you don’t.

You’ve found yourself in a classic pickle situation lol.

Not all hope is lost. You know that transitions don’t last forever lol. Although it may feel like it sometimes.

The moment you decide, is the moment everything changes.

In a previous Joyful Sovereignty Weekly, we discussed the concept of the “organic algorithm of consciousness”.

When you decide something, life begins to present solutions, people, connections and clarity. All to move you toward that experience.

It is as simple as deciding, yet not as easy.

You deciding for the next chapter you desire will bring it closer to you.

How that happens usually isn’t known. It's often somewhat a surprise. That is why playing life more like a game can be a fun way to “see how it happens”.

I know, that can be hard to do when we’re talking about something so “serious” on the line here.

We’re often talking about big life changes. How can someone present such a irresponsible thing to do in a time like this.

I’ve been there.

I’ve left the military on the feeling that I “had a bigger mission” to go after. I didn’t know what it was, how to define or what to do to get there.

Yet I moved forward on the path.

When I left a business I founded, it was the most difficult decision I had ever made.

It wasn’t a joke or something “light-hearted”.

Now that I’ve moved through that, I’ll tell you what I wished.

I wished someone would have looked me directly in the eyes and told me to decide on the path that excites me. And when I looked back into their eyes, I could see the knowing, experience and deep care they were expressing with.

I didn’t have that.

I wished I did. But I moved forward anyways.

All our paths are different. I am sharing this message because that is what I’m meant to do.

Whoever resonates with it will find the truths they need and discard the rest.

If you’re going through a transition right now, this is my message to you.

It could be a life-changing transition, or it could be a “minor” one.

This is also a message to myself.

From the deepest part of my heart to your heart, I tell you this.

Go after what excites you.

Follow your curiosity.

See where it takes you.

Allow it to guide your path towards Joyful Sovereignty.

Trust yourself and the journey.

This is no message of naïveté, but that of courage.

Mountains will move once you fully decide. You won’t know how it’ll change things for you until it does.

Deciding can be difficult, because you can “think” you decided. Only to find out later you were only half-committed.

That can be a hit to the ego.

But that’s okay. That’s growth. You will continue on your path. When you fully decide, you will absolutely, 100% feel it.

It will FEEL different than just “thinking” it.

Once you feel it, that wisdom will be with you forever.

Once you decide on a way forward, seek support.

That may look like a lot of different things.

That could be:

• People to help you
• Mentors and guides
• Frameworks and roadmaps
• Concepts and processes
• Accountability and a kick in the ass
• Resources like books, courses and systems
• Anything else

There will likely be a few ups and downs, maybe more. Get help early on and as often as you need. You are not alone on this journey. You have support all around you. Just need to ask for it.

This weeks action step is simple, but may not be easy. It is to fully decide on which path you will take. How you will move forward powerfully on your next chapter. All the detail of HOW it will happen will be revealed. Do everything you need to. Experiment, talk with people.

Whatever it is to work it out.

1. Fully decide on a path forward

That’s it for this edition of the Joyful Sovereignty Weekly!

Wish you a great rest of your day!

Best,

Lane

P.S. If you enjoyed this edition, share this link on your social media or with a friend who you think would enjoy reading this.

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If you have an idea or something that you’re navigating through, please let me know. From now on, I’ll be tailoring the message to the audience. Reply back to this email with your topic.

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